I don't know what exactly I was thinking when I was sitting there, on that park bench… Well, maybe I do, but I'll get to that later…
As you'd expect on a typical weekend, or to be specific, past 4 pm on a weekend, the park was filled with people.. But within me - I'm just going to say it and by default be labeled 'overly dramatic' - there was a cold emptiness. Like a void. And I ws feeling like crap, how ever crap must feel.
Being a pretty damn good looking male specimen of the human species, there were a whole lot of girls there who were checking me out.
Wow. I sound rather self obsessed don't I?
Well, no. there weren't a whole bunch of girls checking me out. Just two or three.
And I'm not extremely good looking either. Just enough to live by, I guess. Dark hair, dark eyes, tanned skin. I often worked out to vent my frustration. And I was pretty mad recently… So yeah…
Anyway, these two girls standing by a tree a little distance away were "discreetly" (oh those quotation marks in the air) looking at me. It appeared as though one of them was trying to convince the other to come over and talk to me. I looked at the poor girl who was currently being subjected to an intense brainwashing session. She was cute. And had a sort of natural beauty to her, a sort of wholesome goodness. The kind of girl you might strike off a long term thing with. The kind of girl who was my type.
I hoped she wouldn't come over.
Nope, you didn't read that wrong. I didn't want her to try to get to know me or even worse, try to ask me out. Because I really don't like letting people down. Even if I probably am never going to see her again. Ever.
It sucks to see the disappointment on their faces. Well not all of them were disappointed. The predator types would make a pouty face and move on to the guy sitting on the next bench, or that guy walking the dog or that guy playing with his son.
Seriously, I've seen it happen.
"Hey Mister.. Have you seen my airplane?"
A little boy of about five or six, with a head full of golden curls, looking up at me with beautiful hazel eyes. That was the source of the interruption to my deep rooted contemplation.
"Umm.. I haven't" I watched his face fall, and I added, "How about I help you look for it?"
He looked up, his eyes brightened and a smile appeared on his face.
I picked him up and he pointed towards a couple of trees, I carried him there.
"There!" He shouted, jumping out of my arms. I chased the golden halo till he stopped suddenly, and pointed up into the sky.
I looked up and saw a little yellow remote control airplane stuck in a branch. I put him down and asked him to wait and climbed up the tree.
"Danny!! Where'd you run off to?"
I looked down to see a young woman, picking up the boy.
"Mummy!! The airplane is stuck in the tree!!"
I stopped playing Tarzan and handed the toy to Danny. His mother looked at me with evident surprise. I smiled and was about to say something when Danny, done inspecting his airplane and evidently sure that it hadn't been harmed, threw his arms around me and yelled "Thank you!!"
"Aww.. Its okay"
His mother thanked me and took him away. I went back to my bench.
A happy family. Danny played with his mum and hid dad made him a little sandwich.
Love. Why was it that some people couldn't have this love…? It couldn't be fair that love was 'allowed' to someone and not to someone else.
It wasn't fair. Nobody had a right to discriminate and decide which love was right and which wasn't.
I remembered something someone said to me once… Love is pure in all its forms. Or some crap like that.
My phone vibrated. A call. I picked it up.
Hey..I got to the park. Where are you?
I'm.. West side. By the benches..
Yeah okay…
It was hard to say that I didn't give a shit about what they thought because, after all, they were my parents. They mattered. But how could they decide who I could love and who I couldn't?
"Hey Jake"
I looked up and saw Dan coming over to me.
Yeah I know. He had the same name as the kid. Seems sort of like a cliché, as though if this were a story, the author put the kid there just for the symbolic irony and other B.S. I'm just saying.
"Hey" I said, as he sat next to me.
"How'd it go?"
"It went pretty well, I think. Dad threw me out of the house. Said he didn't have a son."
However hard I tried to put up a brave face, Dan always saw through it. Well yeah, he knew me the best in the whole wide world, he'd better have seen through it.
"Oh crap. What now?"
"I don't know. It doesn't change anything I guess. Not for me anyway."
He was silent. After a few moments I looked up to see his expression.
He had a frown on his face. Sort of like he was deep in thought. His dark eyebrows were scrunched up and his blue eyes were just sad.
"Hey. Don't worry, everything's gonna work out."
He looked at me and gave one of his sudden grins "I was just checking out those girls checking you out.." he said indicating those girls, who were (still??) by the tree.
"Naah.. They're checking you out… Look at the way the blonde girl is looking at your arms."
He shrugged. "Too bad"
"Too bad what?"
Now, he grinned. "Too bad we're taken"
I shook my head… but couldn't help smiling.
He sighed and said, "I keep telling you, wear a sign around your neck, that way you wont have to keep breaking their hearts"
"But then how will you get your childish pleasure at seeing their disappointment?"
"True that… So you ready to crush their hopes and dreams and -"
"Oh, just shut up!" I leaned over and kissed him lightly on his lips. Then we got up and walked out of the park.
As soon as we were out of earshot Dan burst out laughing and said, "Did you see their faces? Oh wow! That was AWESOME!!"
"No I didn't.. Why would I want to!?"
"Heartbreaker!"
"Hey! It's not my fault I don't have I'M TAKEN tattooed across my forehead!"
"You really should consider getting that done…" He said, seriously, "Or even I'M GAY"
"Whatever…"
He probably noticed my tone and realized the direction my thoughts were wandering off in because he stopped walking. He looked straight at me and said, "Look, everything is going to be okay"
"Oh yeah? And how would you know that?"
"I just do."
"Sure."
Sure Dan, be the optimist all you want. But you can't change me, I'm a realist.
Dan the optimist, was also someone who didn't like to see people think too much and slowly drive themselves to insanity. Which was so not what I was doing. But he knew me. He thought I was. So he interrupts my thoughts with -
"You know, it doesn't change anything for me either."
"What?"
"The fact that you can't go back home. I still love you. And I will too. Forever."
I couldn't help laughing "Could you possibly get any cheesier? Or wait.. I don't want to know"
He laughed.
What he said was, probably true. Even if it weren't, he'd managed to make me smile. So I felt I owed him the truth.
And so I told him the truth.
"But then again… I love you too"
--
Otempora
As you'd expect on a typical weekend, or to be specific, past 4 pm on a weekend, the park was filled with people.. But within me - I'm just going to say it and by default be labeled 'overly dramatic' - there was a cold emptiness. Like a void. And I ws feeling like crap, how ever crap must feel.
Being a pretty damn good looking male specimen of the human species, there were a whole lot of girls there who were checking me out.
Wow. I sound rather self obsessed don't I?
Well, no. there weren't a whole bunch of girls checking me out. Just two or three.
And I'm not extremely good looking either. Just enough to live by, I guess. Dark hair, dark eyes, tanned skin. I often worked out to vent my frustration. And I was pretty mad recently… So yeah…
Anyway, these two girls standing by a tree a little distance away were "discreetly" (oh those quotation marks in the air) looking at me. It appeared as though one of them was trying to convince the other to come over and talk to me. I looked at the poor girl who was currently being subjected to an intense brainwashing session. She was cute. And had a sort of natural beauty to her, a sort of wholesome goodness. The kind of girl you might strike off a long term thing with. The kind of girl who was my type.
I hoped she wouldn't come over.
Nope, you didn't read that wrong. I didn't want her to try to get to know me or even worse, try to ask me out. Because I really don't like letting people down. Even if I probably am never going to see her again. Ever.
It sucks to see the disappointment on their faces. Well not all of them were disappointed. The predator types would make a pouty face and move on to the guy sitting on the next bench, or that guy walking the dog or that guy playing with his son.
Seriously, I've seen it happen.
"Hey Mister.. Have you seen my airplane?"
A little boy of about five or six, with a head full of golden curls, looking up at me with beautiful hazel eyes. That was the source of the interruption to my deep rooted contemplation.
"Umm.. I haven't" I watched his face fall, and I added, "How about I help you look for it?"
He looked up, his eyes brightened and a smile appeared on his face.
I picked him up and he pointed towards a couple of trees, I carried him there.
"There!" He shouted, jumping out of my arms. I chased the golden halo till he stopped suddenly, and pointed up into the sky.
I looked up and saw a little yellow remote control airplane stuck in a branch. I put him down and asked him to wait and climbed up the tree.
"Danny!! Where'd you run off to?"
I looked down to see a young woman, picking up the boy.
"Mummy!! The airplane is stuck in the tree!!"
I stopped playing Tarzan and handed the toy to Danny. His mother looked at me with evident surprise. I smiled and was about to say something when Danny, done inspecting his airplane and evidently sure that it hadn't been harmed, threw his arms around me and yelled "Thank you!!"
"Aww.. Its okay"
His mother thanked me and took him away. I went back to my bench.
A happy family. Danny played with his mum and hid dad made him a little sandwich.
Love. Why was it that some people couldn't have this love…? It couldn't be fair that love was 'allowed' to someone and not to someone else.
It wasn't fair. Nobody had a right to discriminate and decide which love was right and which wasn't.
I remembered something someone said to me once… Love is pure in all its forms. Or some crap like that.
My phone vibrated. A call. I picked it up.
Hey..I got to the park. Where are you?
I'm.. West side. By the benches..
Yeah okay…
It was hard to say that I didn't give a shit about what they thought because, after all, they were my parents. They mattered. But how could they decide who I could love and who I couldn't?
"Hey Jake"
I looked up and saw Dan coming over to me.
Yeah I know. He had the same name as the kid. Seems sort of like a cliché, as though if this were a story, the author put the kid there just for the symbolic irony and other B.S. I'm just saying.
"Hey" I said, as he sat next to me.
"How'd it go?"
"It went pretty well, I think. Dad threw me out of the house. Said he didn't have a son."
However hard I tried to put up a brave face, Dan always saw through it. Well yeah, he knew me the best in the whole wide world, he'd better have seen through it.
"Oh crap. What now?"
"I don't know. It doesn't change anything I guess. Not for me anyway."
He was silent. After a few moments I looked up to see his expression.
He had a frown on his face. Sort of like he was deep in thought. His dark eyebrows were scrunched up and his blue eyes were just sad.
"Hey. Don't worry, everything's gonna work out."
He looked at me and gave one of his sudden grins "I was just checking out those girls checking you out.." he said indicating those girls, who were (still??) by the tree.
"Naah.. They're checking you out… Look at the way the blonde girl is looking at your arms."
He shrugged. "Too bad"
"Too bad what?"
Now, he grinned. "Too bad we're taken"
I shook my head… but couldn't help smiling.
He sighed and said, "I keep telling you, wear a sign around your neck, that way you wont have to keep breaking their hearts"
"But then how will you get your childish pleasure at seeing their disappointment?"
"True that… So you ready to crush their hopes and dreams and -"
"Oh, just shut up!" I leaned over and kissed him lightly on his lips. Then we got up and walked out of the park.
As soon as we were out of earshot Dan burst out laughing and said, "Did you see their faces? Oh wow! That was AWESOME!!"
"No I didn't.. Why would I want to!?"
"Heartbreaker!"
"Hey! It's not my fault I don't have I'M TAKEN tattooed across my forehead!"
"You really should consider getting that done…" He said, seriously, "Or even I'M GAY"
"Whatever…"
He probably noticed my tone and realized the direction my thoughts were wandering off in because he stopped walking. He looked straight at me and said, "Look, everything is going to be okay"
"Oh yeah? And how would you know that?"
"I just do."
"Sure."
Sure Dan, be the optimist all you want. But you can't change me, I'm a realist.
Dan the optimist, was also someone who didn't like to see people think too much and slowly drive themselves to insanity. Which was so not what I was doing. But he knew me. He thought I was. So he interrupts my thoughts with -
"You know, it doesn't change anything for me either."
"What?"
"The fact that you can't go back home. I still love you. And I will too. Forever."
I couldn't help laughing "Could you possibly get any cheesier? Or wait.. I don't want to know"
He laughed.
What he said was, probably true. Even if it weren't, he'd managed to make me smile. So I felt I owed him the truth.
And so I told him the truth.
"But then again… I love you too"
--
Otempora
Great story. Something "different". But, I gotta say, kinda shallow emotions.
ReplyDeleteWell... Sometimes things are felt but not said, if you get what I mean... But then again, you're right, I just read it again...
ReplyDelete